Murky Waters

*poem first appeared in issue one with Moss Puppy magazine.

Have you ever drowned under murky water?

Where your hands held onto plants 

that slipped like slime through your fingers 

as you tried to break the algae covered surface 

for air?

No? 

Me neither.

But it feels like I did, 

that day I left school for the hospital 

and couldn’t see anything past the pouring of my tears. 

A million eyes looked at me in that room 

like a million eyes do when you’re under unknown waters,

watching and waiting, 

observing your next move.

I hope those swamp creatures are proud of me 

for digging myself out of the mud. 

It was much easier to die there, 

to lie there, 

than it was to tell the truth in the courtroom.